Skaynk: R.I.P. Homonyms

By: Damian Lampl - 11/19/2010 1:57:02 PM

The Homonyms
From left: Clytt, Nimf, Shyt, Sluhtz, Lezzi, Strippa, Skaynk, Teat, Tuat, Horre

Well, unfortunately Strippa and Shyt didn't pass the "inappropriate" test, either.  So ten toons got the name change hammer, all of them chicks.  I think Blizzard is sexist.

There still exist:

- 22 Strippas
- 53!!! Shyts

Wow.  Fifty-three toons named Shyt on the armory and mine wasn't even level 10 yet.  Amazing.  I, for one, would just like to take this opportunity to thank the soulless prude who took offense to the name, Skaynk.  You are a terrible human being, soulless prude, and you need to seriously reconsider the priorities in your life.

To all the Strippas, Shyts, Skaynks, Sluhtz, Horres, Nimfs, Tuats, Teats, Lezzis, and Clytts in the world offended by such hurtful names, I pity you that your lives are defined by homonyms constituting avatar names in a video game, and that you consider yourselves as such individuals (with the exception of Lezzis; you're all awesome (especially the hot ones) and I mean no offense to you).  But I'm proud that you took a stand against the horrible atrocities people have committed against you and your kind.  Words can be so hurtful and skin can be so thin.

I feel so ennobled by no longer having such undignified toon names that I can practically taste the hollow entitlement we ennobled elitists feel we are rightfully due.  By ridding myself of such filth, my Shyt no longer stinks.  And I have only a soulless prude to thank for getting down on all fours (in mud that is quite likely littered with vomit) to serve as a stepping stone to my elitist high horse.

It's actually the unicorn I alluded to in an earlier post, and I must ride with its horn up my ass to keep all the cutest widdle puppy dogs in my intestine, only to be Shyt out at the most opportune time when I can simultaneously piss rainbows on some soulless Skaynk, proving my elitism to all, and that there is no place in the World of Warcraft for the likes of such low class individuals.

Thank you for opening my eyes to the fact I am infinitely better than you, soulless prude.  You feel honored I mentioned you.  (no, I didn't forget a "should."  I'm telling you how you feel, soulless prude, because that is what elitists do to those beneath them)

R.I.P. Homonyms.  You'll always have a dirty little party going on in my mind.


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